Pope Francis Finds Self In Hell After Taking Wrong Turn In Vatican Catacombs

Pope Francis Finds Self In Hell After Taking Wrong Turn In Vatican Catacombs

2/2/18
 

[So that’s how the smoke of Satan enters the Church! – AQ moderator Tom]

OUTER DARKNESS, HELL—Becoming disoriented by the sight of a shrieking, many-headed snake emerging in agony from a nearby lava pit, Pope Francis reportedly found himself in the depths of Hell Friday after taking a wrong turn in the nigh-endless catacombs beneath the Vatican. “Ah, crap, not again,” said the Pope, cursing his phone’s lack of service and wondering if he should have turned left at the Holy See’s acre-wide pile of Nazi gold. “It always takes me forever to find my way back, even if I can find a demon willing to give me non-allegorical directions. I guess since I’m already down here I’ll check out this Lake of Fire that [former Pope] Benedict says is a must-see, but still, what a way to spend a weekend.” The Pontiff admitted, however, that his infernal excursion was better than the time he got lost in the Vatican’s parking garage, wound up in purgatory, and spent all day listening to the crying of unbaptized babies.

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http://angelqueen.org/2018/03/03/pope-francis-finds-self-in-hell-after-taking-wrong-turn-in-vatican-catacombs/
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2 comments on “Pope Francis Finds Self In Hell After Taking Wrong Turn In Vatican Catacombs

  1. Jack Chick would be proud.

    But only one Nazi reference? And no mention of the Spanish Inquisition, the Crusades, the Index of Forbidden Books, Maria Monk, or the Legion of Decency? They need to teach more courses on the history of anti-Catholic bigotry in American colleges.

    At least we can be sure that Pope Francis won’t indulge in neo-Pelagian triumphalism while confusing Catholics about the real meaning of Pelagianism and Gnosticism.

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