DePaul U. newspaper: Hey, where’d all the Catholics go?

DePaul U. newspaper: Hey, where’d all the Catholics go?

From Cardinal Newman Society Report Card – 1/30/18

By Matthew Archbold

Just one decade ago, 57 percent of incoming DePaul freshmen reportedly identified as Catholic. In 2017, however, that number has plummeted to 38 percent, according to The DePaulia.

At least some of the reasons for this drop off are likely found in these disturbing nuggets in the news story:

“When Selena Miller, a practicing Catholic, applied to DePaul, she had no idea it was a Catholic university.”

“With signs welcoming LGBTQ+ youth, it doesn’t feel like the Catholic faith of yesterday. People don’t seem pushy; they just seem happy to see you.”

“At a school of nearly 23,000 students where at least a third are reporting as Catholic, it would stand to reason that thousands of Catholic students should be roaming the halls. Yet most weekly events put on by Catholic Campus Ministry (CCM) draw between 10 to 25 students.”

Amanda Thompson, director of CCM, said, “DePaul has more of a progressive, liberal Catholicism. …Thompson said that you don’t have to be ‘staunchly Catholic’ to fit in at DePaul. …Thompson said that the lack of Catholics at the supposedly Catholic university ‘isn’t necessarily a bad thing” because ‘this is a place of dialogue.’”

I think those comments sum up the problem rather well, don’t you?

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2 comments on “DePaul U. newspaper: Hey, where’d all the Catholics go?



  1. Bill Gannon: Hey, Joe, where have all the Catholics gone at DePaul?



    Sgt. Joe Friday: How’s that?



    Bill Gannon: DePaul University. It used to be a thriving Catholic college. I asked, where have all the Catholics gone?



    Sgt. Joe Friday: Where have all the Catholics gone? Just be careful. They might turn it into a folk song. Kind of catchy. Watch out for parodies.



    Father Mulcahy, S.J.: Of course, it is interesting that Vatican II hit at the same time that groovy folk music was popular in America. Followed by a decade of self-absorption, therapy, and narcissistic navel gazing in the ’70s that was ripe for sermons laced with quotes from Erich Fromm, Carl Rogers, and Abraham Maslow.



  2. My name’s Friday. My partner, Bill Gannon, and I were workin’ the day shift outta Homicide when the boss called.
    /
    “Fellas, I just got a weird call I want you two to look into.”.
    /
    “How’s that, Captain?”
    /
    “It was an anonymous tip. We’re running a trace but it prob’ly will turn out to be just another public telephone booth. Anyway, the guy tells me to look into the book depository used by the diocese. All he said before he hung up was, ‘There’s a lotta bodies in there if you look deep enough.’ I just dispatched two black and white units patrolling in the vicinity. You fellas can meet ’em there. Mind runnin’ this down for me?”
    /
    “We’re on our way, boss.”
    /
    The depository was across town. Bill and I ran through some possibilities but this lead didn’t add up. Yeah, some folks get a kick outta runnin’ cops around in circles with phoney tips. We figured this was likely to be nothin’ more than that.
    /
    “Joe, ask yourself why anybody would use a textbook warehouse to rub out a group of victims.”
    /
    “How’s that?”
    /
    “I’m just sayin’, maybe the snitch was employing a metaphor. Maybe what’s in the books is equivalent to homicide, ya see?”
    /
    It took 20 minutes to get there but my partner recalled hearing about a good Tex/Mex eatery we could hit after we looked around. So, it looked like this call wouldn’t be complete waste of time.
    /
    Our men were hauling two poofsters out of the depository just as we pulled up.
    /
    “Nothin’ we can’t handle, Sergeant. These fairies are zonked out on hash so it was an easy bust. Patrolmen Tibbins and McPherson are inside the storage area with the day watchman who just came on duty. He told ’em that these two had been casing this building ever since last week. He found a flyer with info on some renegade Jebbie who gave a talk at the nearby parish last weekend. Some kinda Vatican spokesman named Martin, I think it was. We’ll book these two and come back if you need us.”
    /
    “Nah. We can take it from here, Officer. Thanks. These punks usin’ local stuff?”
    /
    “Funny you should ask, Sergeant. It’s el primo, from Ecuador. The taller one said he made his buy at the local illegal alien refuge run by an outfit funded by the Campaign for Human Development. Ever hear of it?”
    /
    “Yeah. And way too often.”
    /
    My partner and I went in and looked around the office. Then we headed in to meet the remaining Patrolmen and the day watchman.
    /
    “Glad to see you, Sergeant. Take a look at what we found when we broke open a crate marked “3rd Grade Science Texts.”
    /
    My partner did the honors and reached into the crate. He let out a low whistle.
    /
    “Joe, this is titled, ‘Jenner On Greenhouse Gasses.’ Look who’s mug is right on the cover!”
    /
    “Let me take a wild guess. Caitlyn?”
    /
    “Yep. Standin’ right next to Algore, at the UN. I see Elton John wrote a promo blurb for the back cover, too.”
    /
    Just then the day watchman walked over and said he just made his hourly rounds but was ordered to never open any of the crates. I figured he was being straight with us. I asked if he noticed any unusual activity besides the two zonked goofballs hangin’ around for several days.”
    /
    “Yeah, one thing yesterday. This big limo with diplomatic plates and Italian flags on the hood. It cruised by the office twice. Real slow, see? It finally parked down in front of the next warehouse and waited, oh, no more than five minutes. A huge Benz pulled up next to it and some men got out and walked to the far side of the limo. Then this guy, looked like he was a bishop or somethin’, wearin’ a red sash, see?, well he climbs outta the limo and starts pointin’ right at this building. Then, he and the guys from the Benz start laughin’ and slappin’ this clergy guy on the back. After that, they all just got back in their vehicles and pulled away, real slow, like, see?”
    /
    “Yes, sir. I’m afraid I do.”
    /
    Bill and I walked quickly back to our car. I radioed in to the Captain what we’d just learned. He said he would be on the horn to Child Protection Services and the Italian consulate to get a make on the limo and its occupant. He also told us to let him know when we were going to get back after lunch. He wanted us to meet with him and the head of the Vice Squad.
    He told Bill to bring back a takeout order of smoked brisket with extra ‘slaw before he clicked off.

    (To be continued…)

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