FROM THE WORKING DRAFT FOR THE SYNOD ON YOUTH 2019

FROM THE WORKING DRAFT FOR THE SYNOD ON YOUTH 2019

 

WARNING: SATIRE not truth

Working Draft

Mulieres Vocamus- We Call Women.

2019 Exhortation

  1. So many girls and young women plaintively and humbly recounted their call from the Holy Spirit to the priesthood that they cannot be ignored. We must recognize that these girls and young women, and those who identify as such, catholic and not, many of them but teenagers, are not lying and they are not mistaken. 1 The Spirit is the Spirit of Truth and We know that the Father of Lies would not do this because a house divided against itself would fall – unlike the totally united Church of today.2

 

  1. With 79% of the 485 carefully chosen bishops (representing over 7.93% of all bishops) agreeing in their post-synodal report (well-researched and painstakingly prepared before the synod began), We now see that We must integrate joyfully all the faithful into all the sacraments, We issue this proclamation. To do otherwise is to practice an intolerance, prejudice, injustice, and bigotry that can only be of the devil, as would be opposition to this truth, truth latent for centuries and now brought into the light by Us.

III.              We now develop the insights of these relatively few enlightened shepherds  and the fruits of the indwelling of Our Spirit in these girls and women who have been called (and we pray daily  for those girls and women who were led into error by The Evil One and said there was and is no such call). Based on these pre-synodal and synodal private revelations, and the report of the shepherds – We now elevate what they have done to real, just doctrine.   For almost two millenia We have not heard, or We have ignored, Our Spirit, but now We hear, now We listen, now We act. 4

  1. Canon 1024 is, by Our decree, hereby changed from “A baptized male alone receives sacred ordination validly” to “Only A Baptized Person receives ordination validly.”  This is Our teaching and We order that it be held definitively, without question or ridicule, by all the faithful. We apologize for:  the centuries of error, the mistakes of numerous ecumenical councils, the falsehoods of so many declarations, the wrongheadness of so many bulls, so many simply wrong encyclicals, and, frankly, the stupid errors of almost all  predecessors in this office.We are heartily sorry to all the girls and women called by Us who have been denied the Sacrament of Holy Orders.
  2. We note that Jesus’s Command Of The Lord that only males be ordained, clearly present in His inspired Holy Scripture, was for His time on earth only, and that divergent interpretations of this Command, applying it misogynistically and patriarchally – for almost two thousand years – were mistaken and/or of the devil.

 

In conclusion, We solemnly proclaim  these teaching of old which are now again revealed.6

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