Posted by Oakes Spalding on FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 25, 2016
I have obtained a draft version. Sources tell me that the New Decalogue will be promulgated soon after the four cardinals are beheaded.
1. I am the LORD your Pope: you shall not heed strange Popes before me.
2. You shall not take Yes or No questions to me.
3. Remember the late 1960’s and keep them holy.
4. Please report dissident relatives to the proper authorities.
5. You shall not discard that which can be re-used.
6. Life is complicated.
7. Let it go.
8. You shall bear false witness against your neighbor if it favors the progressive cause.
9. You want American cigarettes? You want woman? You want man?
10. The powers not expressly delegated to the Pope by this document are nevertheless reserved to him. See 1.
By Francisco I with Victor Manuel Fernández, Feast of Che Guevaro, anno Bergoglio 4.