“Wake Up!” The Rock of Peter is a Rolling Stone

“Wake Up!” The Rock of Peter is a Rolling Stone

Written by Michael Matt | Editor, The Remnant
Monday, November 9, 2015


Dear God, help us.

A whole slew of the doctrine-lite and emotion-overload homilies of Pope Francis have found their way into the Pope’s first rock-pop album released in Italy last Friday (November 6, 2015).

The ghastly thing is called “Wake Up!”, which somehow seems appropriate given that it should serve as a fairly effective wake-up call for Catholics everywhere.

That’s right, time to wake up to the fact that the Catholic Church has suffered a coup d’état at the highest levels and that the bride of Christ now finds herself held hostage by a cabal of modernists who intend to permanently disfigure her face, refashioning it in the image and likeness of the modern world.

The Catholic-bashing Rolling Stone magazine is all “down with this”, of course, noting on its website that it is “proud to premiere” Wake Up! by Pope Francis. The magazine enthusiastically promotes a couple of tracks as teasers for the 11-track Vatican-approved extravaganza of screaming guitars, Latin rhythms, hip-hop beats and papal rap.

Rolling Stone offers its highest praise for the album’s title track, “Wake Up! Go! Go! Forward!” which is Pope Francis addressing a South Korean audience in English last year amid “atmospheric synths, trumpeting horns and skyscraping electric guitars reminiscent of Godspeed You! Black Emperor.”

Let’s think about that for a moment. Rolling Stone—the notoriously pro-sexual revolution, pro-gay marriage, pro-abortion pop culture magazine of record—can’t say enough good things about Pope Francis. Nothing to see here?

Hold on, Jimmy! Its editors say nothing at all about being moved by the Pope’s teachings and homilies to amend their ways or follow Christ. Just the opposite, in fact. Rolling Stones hails Francis for moving beyond those antiquated and divisive teachings of the Church that are so detested by cool kids everywhere, in the Church and out:

On Wake Up!, Pope Francis speaks to the listener in Italian, English, Spanish and Portuguese over 11 tracks to address issues like peace, dignity, environmental concerns and helping those most in need. . .

It’s Pope Francis’ belief that every person should be treated with love and respect, a message that has made him universally loved after critics chastised the Catholic Church for alienating its base and the world outside the Vatican with hardened views.

Ah, yes, those “hardened views” of Holy Mother Church, so obscene to the enlightened ones at Rolling Stone magazine. Those hateful rules. Those evil dogmas. Those Catholic fundamentals rightly abominated by cultural revolutionaries everywhere and now, according to Rolling Stone, abandoned and shunned by Pope Francis.

The Catholic Church finally “got with it, man!”

‘We love this pope’, says the magazine that’s been cranking out Christophobic rot since November 9, 1967.

Can you see it– I mean, that little white flag flying high over St. Peter’s in Rome? It’s the flag of surrender in the global culture war, and like Jagger and Bowie, the world, the flesh and the devil are dancin’ in the street.

What else needs to be said about this disastrous pontificate but that it’s most enthusiastic support comes from the most outspoken critics of Catholic moral theology in the world today.

Here’s a bit of “Wake Up”.

Well, it’s better than Miley. Right? Please, let’s wake up, shall we? “Wake Up!” is the soundtrack for the ongoing abomination of desolation in the Church. If Catholics are not particularly bothered by this–well, God help them. Their brainwashing training session is nearly complete, and they’re now graduating into the New Church. They’ve lost their sensus catholicus completely, and all they have to do now is ignore the following mumbo-jumbo and keep on rockin’ in the real world:

“If the world hate you, know ye, that it hath hated me before you. If you had been of the world, the world would love its own: but because you are not of the world, but I have chosen you out of the world, therefore the world hateth you. Remember my word that I said to you: The servant is not greater than his master. If they have persecuted me, they will also persecute you: if they have kept my word, they will keep yours also.” (John, Chapter 15)

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2 comments on ““Wake Up!” The Rock of Peter is a Rolling Stone

  1. “Papa was a rollin’ stone…”


    Father sleeps in another room
    We his children
    Have lost aplomb —
    Father sleeps in another room.

    Father’s walked out of the house
    Left us with
    The beloved spouse —
    Father’s walked out of the house.

    Father’s in vogue but from us he runs
    He’s now one of them
    And the family he shuns —
    Father’s in vogue but from us he runs.

    Father sleeps in another room
    But our Uncle’s sons
    The Bridegroom

    They sacrifice,
    Preserve our seemed,
    Tomb —
    While Father sleeps in another room.

  2. Captain Kirk: Mister Spock! Pope Francis on the cover of Rolling Stone… analyze using your usual superior Vulcan logic!

    Spock: It is possible, Captain, that modernism has jumped the shark by turning Catholicism into a hip-hop CD. By extending inculturation of the new evangelization to mass pop culture, there is a certain risk of diminishing the gravitas of the Catholic brand and falling under Frankfurt School social engineering thereby rendering the FrankenPapacy too silly and missing an opportunity for genuine evangelization of culture. We must study the hermeneutics of this project very carefully to discern the next direction for progressive modernism as an ecclesial movement.

    Captain Kirk: Are there any other risks or dangers, Mister Spock?

    Spock: Working out the neo-Kantian implications and hermeneutics of this will take time, Captain. On the other hand, if he gets invited to appear on Dancing with the Stars, Pope Francis will have to pick his partner very carefully.

    Reverend Neuhaus: Forgive me for interrupting again as pushy and aggressive professional Protestant converts sometimes do, but this discussion of Rolling Stone and Pope Francis as a pop culture sensation might be a good time to discuss the Naked Public Square in modernity and Professor Charles Taylor’s secularization theories…

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