What Can You Do With A Benedict Who retires?

O.K., this has been going through my head ever since BXVI announced his retirement. The only way to purge it is to inflict it on you, my unfortunate friends.

It’s based on this:

What Can You Do With A General?

And the altered lyrics are thus:

When his reign was over, Red Hats all over swore
At the coming Conclave, where they went to war
But for Benedict things were not so grand
And it’s not so hard to understand

What can you do with Pope Benedict
When he stops Pope Benedict?
Oh, what can you do with a Roman Pope who retires?

Who’s got a job for Pope Benedict
When he stops being Pope Benedict?
They all get a job but Pope Benedict no one hires

They fill his head with nonsense while he’s at World Youth Day
And they wear their Rainbow Sashes while swearing they’re not Gay
The next day someone hollers when he comes into view
“Here comes Pope Benedict ” and they all say “Benedict who?”
They’re delighted that he came
But they can’t recall his name

Nobody thinks he’s unmalleable
When he stops being infallible
Six Centuries since Catholics have enjoyed
A Holy Father who decides to be Pope Benedict

Sorry. I feel better now.

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